You never seem to have time to do anything for yourself (go to a movie, dinner with a friend, etc.) because you're either too busy solving the world's problems or exhausted from the effort of trying.
Like a professional juggler performing before a crowd of thousands... you MUST keep every ball in the air and make it look effortless. Maybe you've let a ball drop in the past and someone, whose expectations of you are pretty high (because you've become an expert juggler), has harshly criticized you. Maybe you're thinking, "Gee... I can't let these balls drop because if I do... I'm pretty worthless."
Like a professional juggler performing before a crowd of thousands... you MUST keep every ball in the air and make it look effortless. Maybe you've let a ball drop in the past and someone, whose expectations of you are pretty high (because you've become an expert juggler), has harshly criticized you. Maybe you're thinking, "Gee... I can't let these balls drop because if I do... I'm pretty worthless."
That used to be me... I still catch myself doing it every now and then... but now I'm more aware of it. My Pastor told me at one time that he was going to send me to "Over-Committer's Anonymous" where we would sit around in chairs and practice telling each other, "NO!". I thought that was a funny analogy and at the time I just laughed about it, but it stuck with me and to this day I hear his voice saying this very thing whenever I start feeling over-whelmed.
Ever wonder what would happen if you just stood still and let the balls drop to the ground?? I wondered for a long time but did nothing. Then one day... I realized that there were a lot of people around me who were throwing their balls into my juggling act and I was juggling their balls as well. They were happy to sit back and enjoy the show and allow me to do all the work on their behalf. Some of them even took credit for MY hard work.
One day... I threw my hands up and let all the balls come crashing down, figuratively speaking. I just stood there watching them bounce around and roll away until they all stopped moving. I pictured myself picking them up one at a time to see which particular ball each one was... one said, "Derek", who's my son and another, "Lauren", my daughter. I picked them both up and put them in my bucket. I walked around looking at each of these balls until I had identified the ones that were important and that I and I alone was responsible for. I put them all in a bucket and sat down to rest for the first time in a VERY long time. I watched as others slowly and reluctantly came over and picked up their balls and walked away. Some of them were angry or disgusted that they were suddenly having to take up the slack for ME. I started to laugh as I realized that I wasn't the only one who wasn't "getting it". Others will sometimes develop a sense of entitlement... that you some how owe it to them to juggle their balls. Eventually... the balls were all claimed by their rightful owner. The number of balls had gone from 20 to 4 in a matter of minutes. It was amazing how much happier I became and how much time I had for my kids and time to do the things I love to do.
I learned to be a better leader and a better follower as a result of this epiphany of events. If I'm an efficient leader, I am a delegator and helping the team succeed by teaching others to do the work. If I'm an efficient follower, I'm learning to support the leadership of others and do my part to help the team succeed. Just because someone does things differently than I do does not make it wrong. Allowing the creativity of a team to flow produces much better results and makes room for the leadership qualities of others to emerge. The result is that my stress level has dropped dramatically and I'm enjoying my life for the first time in many years.
Are you a professional Juggler??? Are you allowing others to make you responsible for their part? And more importantly.... are you stifling the growth of others by insisting upon juggling their balls? Only you can change that!!
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