Today... my Pastor posted a simple question... "What new thing has God impressed upon you today? Ask yourself."
He posts things like this all the time and I mostly just click "like" and sometimes share to my wall as well. But today, I had to pause and reflect on this question. Don't know why this particular question, but God really spoke to my heart about it. As I continue to mull it over, I believe that He's trying to impress upon me that my answer to this question is the key to "everything" that's not quite right in my life. Don't get me wrong... I have a great job, a wonderful relationship with a man whom I fully believe loves me more deeply every day, amazing kids/kids-in-law and grandkids. There's just this lingering thing that I can never quite put my finger on.
Today... I answered Pastor Bill's question thusly, "That I am loved and it's okay to trust people and receive it... and that the speed of my healing is contingent upon my willingness to allow Him to heal my heart. That fear of being hurt again is my bitter enemy!"
Wow... what an epiphany! You can be the most loved person on the planet and your heart not truly receive that because of fear.
Sometimes we can be in pain and maybe no one knows (including ourselves) and it can seem as if no one really cares. And then again, others may know we are hurting and not know what to do to help us or know how to help us. Most think that "time heals all things" but that's only true if we allow ourselves to be healed...
Isaiah 61:1 proclaims that the Lord sent Jesus to bind up the broken-hearted, free the captives and release prisoners from the darkness. He came to do more than just relieve our pain... He came to correct the cause of our pain! The real problem is a broken relationship with Him. Even though I know Him intimately, I don't always filter everything through 'His way of doing things'. I realize that my pain goes waaaaayyyy back.
I finally know what my New Year's Resolution is going to be... I'm going to purpose in my heart to allow that which was broken to be restored. God I need you to help me with that, in Jesus' name I ask it! Amen!
Hey if this applies to you too... please message me... we can pray a prayer of agreement and do this thing together!
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